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| Why are you hiding? Why do you run? Fighting through life is what makes it so fun. You wish it were better, but you won't try. Nothing will change if you sit there and cry. Open your eyes, take a good look. This world that you live in is more than a book. Don't try to turn pages, just set it on fire, and then you may get what you truly desire. The freedom to live; it's commonly sought. No price can be paid for it to be bought. It must be deserved; bled for; earned. To get it your entire world must be burned Take off the armour, pull down your walls, Remove all your nets and experience the falls That define you in life; make you who you are, So maybe one day you can be your own star; Create your own light, see your own way; Stop being an actor in this silly play. Just take of your mask, for once just be you, And soon you'll find others are doing so too. It's worth it to do, I'm sure you'll soon see, From your light the shadows forever shall flee. | | |
| This is a 3 part series. Enjoy. You're nye but a fool to believe what you see. This shadow before you is surely not me. The pain is the past never truly left, the smiles you saw a product of theft. Happiness drained from those all around, stealthy; bloodthirsty; a relentless hound. I ran from the fears, from the anger and tears, I pushed it all under, ignored it for years. And now here I stand, faced with the fight, the thoughts of self-destruction shattering my night. Shaking and sweating I push my mind back, rewinding the pattern, resetting the track. I hide underneath this mask; this facade, acting, pretending, and yet you applaud. Inside my head, the fight will not stop, till the day I am dead, till depression's on top. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The onset ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The slow onset of depression is like a fire spreading through a house. It starts with a small spark that catches a sheet of paper, just a little glow that's unnoticed. Then the paper starts to burn and you worry a little; it's just a knot in your stomach when you're alone. Then the table and walls start to burn; and your chest feels heavier all the time, your shoulders knot up, it gets hard to move. Then as the whole inside building is engulfed, you can't sleep, you aren't motivated, it's hard to eat or you can't stop eating, you never say the right thing, you stutter, you find yourself afraid to do anything. And the source is still there, still glowing away, and you know that, for some reason, if you could put out that one source, the whole thing would stop. And yet even once the building is engulfed, the roof has collapsed, the walls teeter inwards, and you find yourself shaking in your sleep, unable to hold back tears, wanting to claw at yourself to make it stop hurting, you know that even if it goes away, you'll never be the same. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~` The feeling ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A shadow amongst shades The pain never fades It stills itself for a time Sits and lets itself prime Then when it's ideal It brings you to feel Nothing. Not even numb Can't sing, whistle or hum No emotion, no cares. Can't pay life it's fares. The need to exist disipates Want to take life from the fates It ends how it began At the hand of another man And yet you're still here Fighting off your every fear But you're still all you are Feeling similar but so far A shadow amongst shades | | |
| For years the struggle to be accepted To simply fit Has torn through society Tormented it Forced individuality To conform to it To it's idea of right and wrong To live by it To it's concept of in and out To believe it That it knows what's best for us To trust it That it knows what you like To love it And we die by it's hand Bit by bit Until we end up as one | | |
| Your head spins Heartbeat rises Your eyes flash Like fireflies Floating in a hollow brook Tears of hate and hapiness To fight or flight It's always asked We never know We always choose Defensive life Offensive tongue Forever running circles If we really knew what it was like To care, to love, to feel Would anybody really care? Or would the need to breed Just overcome The feeling of perfection Continuation of the soul A torment that was chosen Living through this hell This world If only we could. If only we knew. When the world comes crashing in Who will you run to then or Will it be more who comes running Back to you Back to hate and anger When the world comes crashing down Will you be there Or will I keep running Away from this life Away from this hate Back to the place it started Explosions and hellfire Brimstone and ashes The place I lived is gone and dead You were the spark My ember My now and forever And here I stand charred From surface to soul | | |
| When smiles fade to looks of concern, the rapture comes,where will you turn When time collapses into the ground will you still be running, Will I be around. The sky falls to ashes, the oceans all boil, ensnared and endangered, we're caught in the coil. A lack of embraces cause overkill pain, destruction of earth, can we try again. When the starting all ends, does the end truly start or is it finally over, and time to depart. Do we each go our own way as travelers lost, or share the depression at a life ending cost. This is the part you tell me it's ok This is the part where I tell you I'm not Collect all the pieces and see where they fit This puzzle of mine, won't you finish it? The ground starts to shatter,the trees start to fall, It's over now, it's ending, it's death for us all. Try to escape, hide if you can It won't leave alive no woman or man The rapture has come, where will you turn, Our smiles have faded to looks of concern | | |
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